The 12th man
Football is a complicated sport. There are lots of rules. It takes guts, grit and determination to pursue a spot on a team and dedication to keep it. There are risks and rewards that are seen on and off of the field. Football is physically demanding and you are almost guaranteed to be in physical pain at some point and you're almost always just one hit away from a serious injury. So what good could come from a sport that almost certainly guarantees you harm at some point in time? That's a really good question. Being a part of a team (no matter the sport/club/etc) is full of life lessons. Contact sports create such a strong camaraderie that it is almost like being in battle together. The friendships and bonds formed while practicing, running, hitting, planning, sweating, and executing everything you learned all week in one night, is like no other. As a fan it's easy to just watch the game and cheer and share in the joy of the wins or the disappointment of the losses. As a mom, it's a whole new ballgame. Tripp has taken to football and loves it, he is all in and wants to be in on ALL the action. He is still learning the game and still learning how to hit and be hit and run and not be run down but the joy he has for the game warms my heart. The fear of him being hit too hard or trash talked on the line is new for me, but I am learning to just be there and not step in... I am learning to just encourage and not over step my lines... learning. I'll leave that there for now. Ty also loves him some football. He loves to watch the game and gets excited when he sees them tackle each other, so much so that last year we signed him up to play with Tripp. I didn't know how it would look or how or what all he would do but we gave it a shot. Getting used to the pads and helmet took some time but by the end of the season he loved to be chased down and tackled by his teammates and absolutely loved being out there on game day. Fast forward to this year and we are out there again. He is at practice and even though he doesn't always do exactly what the others are doing, he is welcomed there. He is doing more this year than he did last year. His teammates know his name and they find ways to communicate with him and they always want him to participate. His coaches encourage him to run the drills, in his own way and his own pace. (The way he does everything). They are so patient with him and there is something awesome about seeing others require more of him. He's not just on the sidelines or a burden. He's part of their team. Last year Ty got in , a game as a safety on defense and his coach helped him stay in the right position and run a set of downs. This year his coaches told me they wanted to try and get him in each game, however that looks (I told them that was fine with me, and no matter what he is just happy to be here). Ty doesn't run to the action or run to tackle the opponents. We are working on it. He loves to be chased and is learning to catch the ball and we are teaching him to chase the man with the ball but we haven't gotten all of that worked out just yet and I'm perfectly ok with it. In practice his teammates will chase him down and tackle him and he thinks it's hilarious, he gets up and wants to do it over and over again. He likes to do the running drills, but especially loves the one where someone is trying to run him down. He loves to tackle the dummies in slow motion and at times I have to redirect him from playing with the orange cones or sitting down because he doesn't want to watch and run the same play over and over. He wants the action. But that's part of football. Putting in the work. Doing the things that you don't want to do but that you need to do. And I'm glad that he has other adult, men, who require that of him. Last Tuesday Ty was the 12th man. In football you are only allowed 11 players on the field at a time or else it's a penalty. However, his coach arranged with the other team and umpires for him to get in and run a set of downs as an extra safety and it was awesome. There wasn't some big play and we had to make him give up his football on the sidelines to go out on the field and have the coach help him stay in position. But he did it. I could see the joy on his face and the pride after the game and that was enough for me. Will he continue to play football as he gets older? I don't know. Tripp is already planning his college around it! (I'm not sure how I feel about that yet). I also saw something in Tripp when Ty was on the field that I didn't realize until later, he played harder, when Ty was out there as the 12th man. When he got in the truck after the game, he said that coach ran to the line and told the coaches "we have an extra man, ok?" and Tripp said "I was thinking, are you gonna tell them not to hit him?" I laughed, because I understand the feeling but also the freedom that Ty has in those moments. He's just like everyone else, to be hit or not, to yell and jump and be wild on the field or not. The choice is his. Maybe they will both continue to play together and maybe they won't. But for now football has brought my boys together on the field with their peers and an acceptance in this community that I haven't seen anywhere else. Ty isn't a joke or a burden, he is wanted out there. Tripp isn't embarrassed by him, he encourages him and is proud for him too. So for now he's our 12th man, without penalty.
A simple prayer
Last Friday I got a message from Ty's teacher about something he did in class. They had a student in a fender bender and she asked if someone wanted to lead them in prayer. Ty stood up both hands raised and walked to the front of the class and folded his hands and started to pray (in his "words"). At the end of his prayer, she said he spoke a clear "amen". And they were all in tears. Our youth pastor is also at the middle school and he said they all came to him in tears telling him what happened and how shocked they were by him. He is always full of surprises. The last few weeks he has given me a run for my money, he's extremely stubborn and full of preteen attitude. Yes eye rolls and head nods and all. He may be "non-verbal" but he definitely has lots to say and lots of ways to say it. We had lots of come to Jesus meetings between the two of us and lots of "change your attitude" talks. I can't remember how many times I told him he needed to pray and get his head straight. And then I would immediately wonder if he did or if he hears what I am saying and does he understand me? But Friday, when I got that message, I knew he heard me. No he hasn't really changed his preteen attitude but he is listening. It was like God smacked me in the face and said, see. Who does he remind you of? I have prayed and prayed for my boys and I have prayed for them to have the tools they needed to survive in this crazy world and for them to have a passion for Christ above all else and to be used by Him. I hope and pray that his stubbornness will blossom into a love for Jesus that can't be shaken. Until then, I will sit back and attempt to keep my sanity, haha. The verse John 9:3 "but this happened so that the works of God may be displayed in him..." has never spoken more clearly to me as it did last Friday.
