What if you fly ...

I used to dread birthday parties, they would give me the shakes, because there were so many unknowns. Obviously we knew the person who invited us but what about all the other people? I would almost work myself up over all the little things so much that I would get a headache just thinking about all of the what if's. What if a kid picks on Ty? What if he has an accident? What if he accidentally hurts another child because he is just like a bull in an china shop sometimes? What if he slips away and runs off? What if someone stares at us and I say something inappropriate? I could go on and on but I'll stop here.

This year we have branched out and even attended a few 'outside of the family' birthday parties. Just this past weekend we went to a birthday party at a gym and the boys had a blast! When we arrived Ty went a little crazy with some doors but we were able to redirect him. Once we were in the party room he found some balloons and was thoroughly entertained with two balloons and a corner mirror. Tripp gets quiet in large groups with adults and kids and so he was over by the birthday boy not sure if he should put on his mask (it was a super hero party) or just leave it, he eventually decided to wear his captain america mask once the party got going. As we sat at the table visiting with everyone, this little girl came up to us and said "Hey Ty, Ty hey buddy". Ty was very busy in the mirror with his balloons but he did stop to recognize the little girl and just grunted and danced with his balloons. The little girl started talking to me and told me she went to school with Ty and that last year she used to take kids to his class and Ty would slam the door in her face. She said it so matter of fact and I kind of laughed and told her I was sorry he slammed the door. I explained how he loves to watch doors and he really loves to run. Her eyes got big and she said "oh I sure know that! We don't let him out the door when we take things to Mrs Raybon's class". I talked with her for a little while longer and then Ty decided he would join the conversation. He started jabbering and "talking" to her, showing her his balloon and she was just so sweet to him. I even heard her say "yeah that's right, tell me about it" almost in a motherly tone. My heart was so full in these moments. We left the party room and headed out to the gym area and this sweet little girl walked with us and wanted Ty to play with her. Ty discovered the jump from the top of the foam pit and wouldn't do anything else! He saw a boy scale the wall for a higher jump and immediately made his way over there, turned and looked at sam, pointed to the jump and said "EH!" As in Hey put me up there lol. I could constantly hear that girl saying "Ty hey look at this, there's a trampoline over here" "hey Ty, look a slide, do you wanna come with me" "Ty check this out" .... it was so sweet. Made my day to see just a friend from school who knows him and wanted to play. Tripp started off playing with Ty but he was real unsure about that big jump into the foam pit. So it took him a while to finally do it, and he was off with the boys running, jumping, scaling walls.... just doing whatever and coming back often to check on his bro and then finally making the jump off the ledge. When it was time to go, neither of the boys were ready and Ty fussed at first but he was pretty worn out so it wasn't a big fight.

So I guess all of that to say, birthday parties aren't that bad anymore. Yes some fears will always be there but if you go through life wondering "what if" and not doing something just because you're scared. Well then you will never do anything... there's a quote that says:

What if i fall? Oh, but darling, what if you fly?! - erin hanson

Ty was fearless on that foam pit jump... I have a few blurry pictures of him falling just flat out, face first-belly flop, into the foam. Not a care in the world and so excited. It makes me think of how brave he is, how willing he is to just fall, arms wide open, grinning and squealing with excitement... and how he can just fly .... That's exactly how we should be, we should be willing to let it all go and just fall face first into the arms of Jesus.... These boys of mine teach me something new every day, I don't know what I would do without them. Thanks for reading :) love y'all!

Here are a few blurry shots of Ty falling into the pit and a few of Tripp and that sweet little girl who played with Ty:

just a little outing and an update

So, me and the boys went to Apple Bees for lunch (bc we had a gift card) on sunday. We sat in a booth, all on the same side, and throughout lunch Ty was pretty active ... he wasn't terrible just jumpy and laughing and did get obsessed with a few things here and there - like a picture on the wall that had a basketball, he just kept trying to take it down, luckily it was screwed in pretty good! Ha! I wrestled him a few times to get him to turn back around in his seat all while still trying to give Tripp attention etc. Tripp kept himself occupied with his kids menu games and he and I had some mad games of tick-tack-toe going on in between me feeding and wrestling with Ty.... Well as we were wrapping up lunch this man comes and sits in the open side of our booth and then tells us that he likes to acknowledge when he goes out to eat and sees well behaved kids, and told us how sweet the boys had been through lunch and then gave the boys $6 to split between them. As we walked out we gave him and his wife a Ty bracelet and Tripp thanked them one more time and Ty told them "bye".... it was definitely unexpected ... I probably wouldn't have said Ty was "well behaved" that day but this man did, so maybe I need to not stress so much over all the little things and just let them be kids .... and to encourage both of them in the good behavior that they do show. Tripp is such a big helper, he does so much and thinks about a lot of things most 6 year olds wouldn't have to think about ... it was just really kinda crazy to get that kind of acknowledgement from a complete stranger.

Update on Ty:
We have started Ty on a new medication and the doctor said it will take a couple of weeks before it really gets in his system. So far there has been no change. He's been very defiant lately and throwing tantrums and even at times hitting. The last time we tried medication we went through 2 or 3 before just taking a break from it all and he ended up balancing out on his own and listening more, behaving, etc. As school started back and we got more into the everyday routine his behavior just became worse and worse so that's why we decided to give medication another try. We may end up trying a few different things before we know what med and what dosage works for him. But I'm hoping and praying we get the right one that still lets Ty be Ty and just takes away a lot of his anxiety and defiantness (if that's a word?). We will see. Prayers are much appreciated in all of this.